Either way, though, you may be much better off on a site like Fetlife , which though global and not strictly speaking a dating site does have a truly enormous userbase and many, many groups and subforums for singles, posting personals and sharing information about events and niche interests. CollarMe is a true personals site. It's also global, but has many British users. It's kinda shoddy and web 1.
And to be quite honest it has got me laid more often than I may care to admit. Feel free to look up MisterTorn on either of the last 2 sites if your buddy list is looking too empty and you feel that may be hampering your swag. There's a few people still there, so I gather, but not very many that are actively seeking a partner and it doesn't take very long for people to realize the party is elsewhere and follow it.
You have to sign up and answer lots of the questions for it to whittle down all the members to those who match what you want. Focus on the sex questions first if that is your main concern. Over the past year I have made some good friends who are part of the London 'scene' in some way or other and as far as I know, pretty much all the available people they know are using OKC. As DarlingBri and TheTorns mentioned, Fetlife is another great place to check out. I've heard particularly good things about the Kinky Salon London parties, although I couldn't possibly comment myself Scammers are on every dating site, and it's not the sites themselves that post those things.
It's just part of the digital flotsam and jetsam, so to speak. Also, online dating fraud is currently rampant in the UK. The case became something of a cause celebre in both BDSM and LGBT circles, with failed appeals before the House of Lords , and the European Court of Human Rights One vote the other way, and the recent history of UK sexuality might have been a very different thing indeed. There have, too, been apparently inconsistent rulings since. Most notable was the case of R v Wilson , in which it was ruled that consensual branding, between husband and wife, was not unlawful.
The judge ruled that a husband who had branded his wife with a hot knife while the two were consensually re-enacting a scene from The Story of O was not guilty of an offence. Overturning an original conviction, the Court of Appeal stated: These remarks, while outwardly positive for the BDSM community, have done little to dispel the view that the law is not even-handed between gay and straight in sexual matters.
Or as the Law Commission put it a consultation, Consent in the Criminal Law , in Individuals might happily and lawfully consent to an assault for medical reasons surgery or on the sporting field. They could consent to piercing, tattooing and presumably, branding. They might even, following 19th-century precedent which treated the practice of flagellation in the Christian church as a lawful activity, consent to the infliction of pain for religious reasons. All of the above, plus, more recently, television that makes a show of ritualised celebrity humiliation is lawful.
But only so long as sex is not involved. This approach, they argued, was not without its costs: The outcome, though, as with so many other researched and evidence-based consultations, was less than zero. An incoming Labour government was not interested in liberalising the law around sexual consent. The prevailing ethos may be gauged from the deliberations of the Sexual Offences Review Team SORT , which was established by the Home Office to carry out a much-needed review of sexual offences shortly after.
It was SORT that laid the groundwork for the Sexual Offences Act , and which argued for important reforms of the law on rape: Contemplating necrophilia, for instance, they conceded that there was no evidence it ever happened or was even a problem. But discovering there was not actually a law against it, and considering the very idea repugnant, they proposed one.
So the law on BDSM stuck: If government has its way, it seems likely that that inconsistency will stay too.